- No physical contact with the opposition. Unless there is a special invitation (wink).
- No water balloons. I know they seem like a good idea but they are not and they leave a god awful mess.
- All official parks are hereby designated DMZs. That’s De-Militarized Zone for Larry. That’s right ALL PARKS are safe zones.
- It’s ON between 14:00 (2 o’clock) and 20:00 8 o’clock Wednesday July 4th. At sunset clear and retire your weapon.
- No water balloons. If you hit me with a balloon I will hit you with a rock.
- When this idea was hatched it was all about squirt guns. Not powered pumps that would make a fire fighter drool. While there is no “rule” about pumps and such keep that thought in mind when you are at Home Depot searching for inspiration.
- Do I even need to say water only? Clean water only? Nothing you wouldn’t put in your mouth? I hope not…..
- If you want to play, identify yourself and your target. Last year we used the three middle fingers pointing straight up to signal W for west side of Clear Lake Road or the same fingers pointed sideways ㊥ letting folks know you represent the East side of the Island. If you blast someone who is not playing you are on your own. Know that some of your neighbors have a very poorly developed sense of humor.
- Did I mention NO WATER BALLOONS ? I mean it too. No DANG balloons. Spread the word.
Might be fun to watch the muscle boats go by Saturday around 10:30 or so. Tiffany, at the office, told me that it was the largest poker run in the country. Their web page is www.texasoutlawchallange.com ..there is supposed to be over 130 go-fast boats going up the channel. Should be something to see.
The dog said, "That's a long time to be barking. How about only ten years and I'll give you back the other ten?"
And God saw it was good.
The monkey said, "Monkey tricks for twenty years? That's a pretty long time to perform. How about I give you back ten like the dog did?"
And God, again saw it was good.
The cow said, "That's kind of a tough life you want me to live for sixty years. How about twenty and I'll give back the other forty?
And God agreed it was good.
But the human said, "Only twenty years? Could you possibly give me my twenty, the forty the cow gave back, the ten the monkey gave back, and the ten the dog gave back; that makes eighty, okay?"
"Okay," said God, "You asked for it."
So that is why for our first twenty years, we eat, sleep, play and enjoy ourselves. For the next forty years, we slave in the sun to support our family. For the next ten years, we do monkey tricks to entertain the grandchildren. And for the last ten years, we sit on the front porch and bark at everyone.
Life has now been explained to you.
There is no need to thank me for this valuable information. I'm doing it as a public service. If you are looking for me I will be on the front porch.