Welcome to our little slice of paradise! Clear Lake Shores is probably one of the best kept secrets in the entire Bay Area. Yes we are an island. We are surrounded by Clear Lake, Jarbo Bayou and the Lazy Bend canals. Plug this in to Google Maps and you'll see what I mean 29.32' by 95.01' We are about half way between Galveston Island and the city of Houston and located in north Galveston county. I will try to keep us up on all the goings on that we can walk, boat, bike or drive our golf carts to. Very few things pi$$ me off but one of them is wasting my precious time. I'll try not to waste yours. Enjoy. ab

Wednesday, September 7, 2011

Happy Birthday to...

Buddy Holly was born in Lubbock in 1936.
The Duck Races are on! The Duck Races are on! If you’ve never raced a duck now is your chance. Steph Haynes has them all at her place. Understand there is a limited number so they will be sold for a mere $5 on a first come basis. There may be a few stragglers and if so they will be sold at the benefit. Steph is working out the logistics of bridges and bayous but come rain or shine ( I vote shine) we will see racin’ ducks on Sunday! Start time to be announced. Check back here for updates.
I’m getting’ great vibes about our benefit this Sunday. I think this will be an event we talk about for a long time. I’ll be looking for some help the day of so if you are so inclined just find me and I’ll point you in a direction. Spread the word.
Remember the Farmers Market is holding a raffle for a new Weber Gold grill this Saturday. Proceeds go to the benefit!
The Civic Club meeting is at/in the pool. Same time Ice cream will be served and I’m looking for someone to sell racing ducks. If you’d like to get in early this is your chance.
I hear the City Council meeting was interesting last night. I had to miss that bunch-o-fun for a soccer practice. While I don’t have much to report I’ll bet those that were there will have something to say.
The Tribes- Final installment- (unless the author has been inspired)
Because we did not do that, we are facing another task – keeping the chief.  I will say that for the years I have been here, Chief Shelley has been a fair and balancing influence.  That’s why I thought he was a good choice for administrator.  I have always considered him the premier politician on the island – I don’t know what went wrong.  I just assume Council is wrong.  I assume those influencing Council members are wrong.  I want him to stay and I think Council is very mistaken in their current direction – even crazy to disrupt city government in the face of an above normal hurricane season.  I am personally ready to help run the bums out for this.  But I want to end up with a balanced council so that the important things in CLS are garbage pickup, golf carts, peaceful walking, and parties for the Sundowners.  I hope it is not too late.  But, because of the let down from Ike or running the last bums out, we let our guard down, let sweetness overcome our vigilance of balance in city government, and we are now back to active war. Things got crazy again.  We will fix them.  Some bums will be run out, or at least, they lives will be made miserable.  But we must still maintain the balance of the tribes!
------Public Service Announcement---------
We're entering the very peak of hurricane season, so the time for this item has come.

To: ex-Houstonians, present Houstonians, and future Houstonians
or those who know a Houstonian:
    We're about to enter the peak of the hurricane season, which
starts June 1 and ends November 30.  Any day now, you're going to turn on
the TV and see a weath
er person pointing to some radar blob out in the
Gulf of Mexico and making two basic meteorological points:
    (1) There is no need to panic.
       (2) We could all be killed.
    Yes, hurricane season is an exciting time to be in Houston.  If
e new to the area, you're probably wondering what you need to do to
prepare for the possibility that we'll get hit by "the big one".
    '' Based on our experiences, we recommend that you follow this
simple three-step hurricane preparedness plan:
    Buy enough food and bottled water to last your family for at
least three days.
    STEP 2. Put these supplies into your car.
    STEP 3. Drive to Nebraska and remain there until Thanksgiving.
    Unfortunately, statistics show that most people will not follow
this sensible plan.  Most people will foolishly stay here in Houston.
We'll start with one of the most important hurricane preparedness items:
    HOMEOWNERS' INSURANCE: If you own a home, you must have
hurricane insurance.
   Fortunately, this insurance is cheap and easy to get, as long as
your home meets two basic requirements:
    (1) It is reasonably well-built, and (2) It is located in
Nebraska. Unfortunately, if your home is located in Houston, or any
other area that
 might actually be hit by a hurricane, most insurance
companies would prefer not to sell you hurricane insurance, because then
they might be required to pay YOU money, and that is certainly not why
they got into the insurance business in the first place. 
So you'll have
to scrounge around for an insurance company, which will charge you an
annual premium roughly equal to the replacement value of your house. At
any moment, this company can drop you like used dental floss. Since
Hurricane Alicia, I have had an
 estimated 27 different home-insurance
companies. This week, I'm covered by the Bob and Big Stan Insurance
Company, under a policy which states that, in addition to my premium,
Bob and Big Stan are entitled, on demand, to my kidneys.
    SHUTTERS: Your house should have hurricane shutters on all the
windows, all the doors, and -- if it's a major hurricane -- all the
toilets. There are several types of shutters, with advantages and
    Plywood shutters: The advantage is that, because you make
yourself, they're cheap. The disadvantage is that, because you make them
yourself, they will fall off.
       Sheet-metal shutters: The advantage is that these work well,
once you get them all up. The disadvantage is that once you get them all
up, yo
ur hands will be useless bleeding stumps, and it will be December.
    Roll-down shutters: The advantages are that they're very easy to
use, and will definitely protect your house. The disadvantage is that
you will have to sell your house to pay for them.
    'Hurricane-proof'' windows: These are the newest wrinkle in
hurricane protection: They look like ordinary windows, but they can
withstand hurricane winds! You can be sure of this, because the salesman
says so. He lives in Nebraska.
    'Hurricane Proofing Your Property: As the hurricane approaches,
check your yard for movable objects like barbecue grills, planters,
patio furniture, visiting relatives, should, as a precaution, throw
these items into your swimming pool (if you don't have a
 swimming pool,
you should have one built immediately).
    Otherwise, the hurricane winds will turn these objects into
deadly missiles.
    EVACUATION ROUTE: If you live in a low-lying area, you should
have an evacuation route planned out. (To det
ermine whether you live in a
low-lying area, look at your driver's license; if it says 'Houston'
you live in a low-lying area. The purpose of having an
evacuation route is to avoid being trapped in your home when a major
storm hits. Instead, you will be t
rapped in a gigantic traffic jam
several miles from your home, along with two hundred thousand other
evacuees. So, as a bonus, you will not be lonely.
    HURRICANE SUPPLIES: If you don't evacuate, you will need a mess
of supplies. Do not buy them now! 
 Houston tradition requires that you
wait until the last possible minute, then go to the supermarket and get
into vicious fights with strangers over who gets the last can of SPAM.
In addition to food and water, you will need the following supplies:
    23 flashlights.
    At least $167 worth of batteries that turn out, when the power
goes out, to be the wrong size for the flashlights.
    Bleach. (No, I don't know what the bleach is for. NOBODY knows
what the bleach is for. But it's traditional, so GET
    A 55-gallon drum of underarm deodorant.
    A big knife that you can strap to your leg. (This will be
useless in a hurricane, but it looks cool.)
    A large quantity of raw chicken, to placate the alligators. (Ask
anybody who went through Alic
ia; after the hurricane, there WILL be
irate alligators.)
    $35,000 in cash or diamonds so that, after the hurricane passes,
you can buy a generator from a man with no discernible teeth.
    Of course these are just basic precautions.
    As the hurricane draws near, it is vitally important that you
keep abreast of the situation by turning on your television and watching
TV reporters in rain slickers stand right next to the ocean and tell you
over and over how vitally important it is for everybody
 to stay away
from the ocean.
    Good luck and remember: It's great living in paradise!  Those of
you who aren't here yet, you should come.
(unless you live in Nebraska)


Marie said...

Allen, that has to be the best hurrican preparedness list I have ever read! Now being someone who grew up in the Texas Panhandle, I can tell you that if there's no SPAM left on the shelves, you can't go wrong with Vienna Sausages, potted meat, and crackers! I'm telling you I've been there. Try staying underground in a storm shelter for a while and see what happens! Just saying!!!

Marie said...

Oooops! Forgot to mention that I'm from Lubbock.......Buddy Holly is not buried very far from my Father. I have to drive by Holly's grave to get to my Father. It's always interesting to me what people will leave on his grave site. I also went to the same high school Buddy Holly attended. It is really a big deal in Lubbock to have Buddy Holly as its "claim to fame." People come from all over the world to visit his grave, memorial, statue, and the street that bares his name. For a side note Mac Davis is from Lubbock too!
Remember the song, "OH Lord, it's hard to be humble...when your perfect in eeevvvery way!" I get a strange feeling some folks on this slice of paradice might resemble that song. All I can say is, "God Bless Clear Lake Shores."

Anonymous said...

Anon 5:52 from Tuesday:

Anon 5:52: Apparently working from home also means you don't have to spell correctly, form complete sentences, or make sense. Might I suggest that you not attempt journalism after you start drinking? Those actually successfully working from home do, I am sure.

I have no issue with Craig, nor most who work from home. We do need common sense ordinances, with someone who will dispassionately enforce them. Otherwise we could get a carcinogenic waste-disposal business as a "home" business. However, before those ordinances can be worked on, we need to have functional, intelligent folks in City Government. That means we have to get rid of the Bug Jar Idiots for a start. Subsequently, we must have Intelligent, functional Citizens to speak out, and ultimately oust the Bug Jar Idiots. Ranting here is no more useful than Tami ranting in public: You only get to hide behind the medium.

Vote Intelligently next election, and vote often.

Roselyn said...

Marie, I have been to Eva Peron's grave in Argentina, and to this day and every day people from all over the world come to put flowers on her vault. Her vault is very hard to find because its a huge cemetery, but when you find it you know you have arrived because of all that is left there in her memory. The citizens ADORED her because she cared about the citizens, unlike here.