Welcome to our little slice of paradise! Clear Lake Shores is probably one of the best kept secrets in the entire Bay Area. Yes we are an island. We are surrounded by Clear Lake, Jarbo Bayou and the Lazy Bend canals. Plug this in to Google Maps and you'll see what I mean 29.32' by 95.01' We are about half way between Galveston Island and the city of Houston and located in north Galveston county. I will try to keep us up on all the goings on that we can walk, boat, bike or drive our golf carts to. Very few things pi$$ me off but one of them is wasting my precious time. I'll try not to waste yours. Enjoy. ab

Tuesday, May 31, 2011

Last day of May

Well for all intents and purposes it was a great weekend. With the Maestro’s guiding eye we managed to cook up about 200 lbs of crawfish and serve it to about 75 hungry folks. Munchkins not included. Afterwards please know that I reminded Coonie that y’all showed up for his mudbugs as much as our party. B, couldn’t/wouldn’t do it without you. Thanks to everyone for coming out MJ and I had a ball.
The 7th annual Clear Lake Shore Drag Race was a hit. We had a record setting 24 contestants and the biggest crowd I have ever seen at Lowell Brown Sundial Park. This years winner went to technical off islander but I think he was officially adopted several years ago. Inetta dear, your rock! See you at Big Lots!! Pictures are slow to trickle in but rest assured they will be here as I get them so check back often.
Civic Club meeting is this Thursday. If you haven’t been in a while now would be a great time to get reacquainted. The party season is just getting cranked up YOUR club is always looking for new ideas.
Here’s a BIG HEADS UP FOR ALL WHO WERE AT TODDS party after the race. “While at Todd's party, our camera went missing.  Can you please send out a message to everyone to check their cameras to make sure they have the right one...Ours is a Sony DSC-H55 small, black hand-held camera. There are pics of drag race on it as well as quite a few sunset pics.  It can be returned to 217 E. Shore if anyone does find it...”
A shout out to my cousin Jim. The Right Reverent Jim Batchelor hits the double nickel today. Happy Birthday Cuz. And yes, I still have the pictures…….
A conscience is what hurts when all your other parts feel so good”

Thursday, May 26, 2011

Happy Birthday to John Wayne

Willie Nelson first made the Billboard charts in 1962. Rock on Willie!

Memorial Day is a federal holiday that honors it men and women of the armed forces who paid the ultimate sacrifice for our country. Did you know it was first observed on May 30th in 1868. The date was chosen by a couple of Generals because it was NOT the anniversary of a battle. Originally, it was called “Decoration Day” and Michigan was the first to make it an official State holiday in 1871. In 1882, the name of Decoration Day was formally changed to Memorial Day in "memory" and 'honor" of those who gave their lives fighting for a common cause, America. Whatever your plans for this weekend, be safe and at some point, stop for a second to remember and give thanks all those who have gone before us.

Have you seen the new flags down at Sundial? They represent the 5 branchs of the Armed Forces. Pretty cool.

My weekend is about to go in to overdrive so I probably won’t post anything until at least Monday. Maybe some pictures of the race? Wherever you go and whatever you do have fun, be safe and remember why it’s a holiday. See you around the Island!

There is a new study out about women and how they feel about their asses! I thought the results were pretty interesting:
85% of women think their ass is too fat...
10% of women think their ass is too skinny...
The other 5% say that they don't care, they love him, he's a good man,
and they would have married him anyway

Wednesday, May 25, 2011

May 25th

The Islander will be delivered this Friday. Make sure you look through it for the latest club news and calendar.

Jammin’ on Jarboe is ready to kick off. As soon as I get the schedule from Dennis I’ll post it but I think we’re on for the first Saturday in June. Watch this space  for more.

Heard the new jingle on the radio? Texas’ new seat belt law says every body in the vehicle has to be belted. Yes the back seat too. Remember when they said that if it was made in to law then our insurance would go down because there would be less injury? Everyone who had their insurance premiums go down raise your hand. Uh-Huh. I’m not saying it’s a bad thing I just think we’re stepping on mother natures’ toes by mandating seat belts. Let the Darwinian theory play out. A little chlorine in the gene pool is a good thing. Culling the herd and all that.

Wal-Mart is reporting a run on XL Ladies garments. Wonder what’s up with that? The Drag Race is on for Sunday just before sunset at the park. Be there or be square. I sure hope someone brings jello shots Nancy/Shanna……

It’s time for pool membership renewal. The membership runs from May 1st to April 30th.

Ready or not… Hurricane season starts one week from today. Time to review your plan. Be it a ride out strategy or an evacuation plan. Time to give it a dry run. Ask Lee how his ride out plan worked for Ike.

Tuesday, May 24, 2011

2's day

Hey, before I forget, Thanks Mr. Mayor for putting the big dumpsters around the island for us to get rid of “stuff”. I know I’m not the only one who appreciates it.

Looks like an interesting weekend coming up. Mudbugs on Saturday and Sunday is Glenns Party. Before and after the Drag Race.

And then there’s the much anticipated Drag Race. 7 years. It all started like this “lets get together on Memorial Day. Dress up like women, and run around the park at sunset. We could call it the first Annual Clear Lake Shores Drag Race... Who's in?
 Todd Ford 2005” The rest,  as they say, is history.

This just in from the reigning Queen……second from the left……

 Sunday Memorial Day weekend.
'Girls' should arrive at about 7 pm to give everybody time to check out the competition and make catty remarks about each other's outfits.
 My calender shows sunset to be at about 8:15 give or take.  Just like last year the race will start about sunset and judging immediately after. Cheesy trophy awarded shortly after.

Then there are at least two parties going on, Dowell's and 634 Pine.  Busy day!

Friday, May 20, 2011

It's Friday!

In anticipation of the 7th (you read it right) Clear Lake Shores Drag Race here’s a treat just for you. New to the Island? The race is held at Lowell Brown Sundial Park as close to sunset as we can get it. It will be Sunday, May 29th. There is no set time since it’s a lot like herding chickens. If you have never been you need to know to get there early for parking. Best bet is to share a ride with someone because it is crazy. Is that redundant?  The judges are selected on site and at random so save your breath. It is kid friendly in a weird, twisted sort of way. Like kissing your aunt with a mustache on the lips. You know, the one that smells like stale tobacco…..hey it’s not MY aunt!
This from City Administrator Paul Shelley. Our Island Wide clean up will begin this afternoon. Three large dumpsters have been placed at the Boat Ramp, the Swimming Pool Parking Lot and on the lot at Forest and Clear Lake Road.

NO hazardous waste, NO contractor trash and NO household garbage (including electronics).

Time to clean out the garage!

Anybody out there watching the guy claiming the end of the world is tomorrow? Do I have time to run to the whisky store?  Anybody stop to think about what if he’s right?

 Medical News.....
A study conducted by UCLA's Department of Psychiatry has revealed that    
the kind of face a woman finds attractive on a man can differ depending on    
where she is in her menstrual cycle. For example: If she is ovulating, she is attracted to men with rugged     
and masculine features. However, if she is menstruating, or menopausal, she tends to be more      
attracted to a man with a spear lodged in his chest and tape over his   mouth while he is on fire.                                                                                                                          
 No further studies are expected.                                          

Thursday, May 19, 2011

It's Thor’s Day

A little something to brighten your day…
Even though you can’t see my tongue, believe me when I say it is firmly in my cheek.
Top 10 grossest food defects the FDA deems safe for humans
10. Chocolate: Any 100-gram sample contains three or more rodent hairs (a typical chocolate bar is about 40 grams)
9. Broccoli (frozen): Average of 60 or more aphids and/or mites per 100 grams
8. Popcorn: One or more rodent excreta pellets are found in one or more subsamples
7. Cherries (fresh, frozen or canned): Average of seven percent or more pieces are rejects due to rot
6. Oregano (ground): Average of 1,250 or more insect fragments per 10 grams
5. Raisins (golden): 10 or more whole or equivalent insects and 35 fruit fly eggs per eight ounces.
4. Strawberries (frozen): Average mold count of 45% or more
3. Red fish and Ocean Perch: 3% of the fillets examined contain 1 or more copepods accompanied by pus pockets
2. Mushrooms (canned): Average of over 20 or more maggots of any size per 100 grams
1. Fig paste: Contains 13 or more insect heads per 100 grams
Courtesy of the SciGuy in the Chronicle.