Welcome to our little slice of paradise! Clear Lake Shores is probably one of the best kept secrets in the entire Bay Area. Yes we are an island. We are surrounded by Clear Lake, Jarbo Bayou and the Lazy Bend canals. Plug this in to Google Maps and you'll see what I mean 29.32' by 95.01' We are about half way between Galveston Island and the city of Houston and located in north Galveston county. I will try to keep us up on all the goings on that we can walk, boat, bike or drive our golf carts to. Very few things pi$$ me off but one of them is wasting my precious time. I'll try not to waste yours. Enjoy. ab

Friday, December 30, 2011


Correction! Good news and great news. The first City Council meeting is not until February 7th. I was corrected last night and wanted to pass this along. Only 6 more meetings in which to screw stuff up or not. It is still their choice. Any takers on which way it will go?

Options for your natural Christmas Tree

Rent a mulcher from United Rentals in Leagues City

Take you tree to the Ellington Site on Hwy 3 at Brantley Road. First gate at Ellinton.

League City recycling center 1535 Dickinson Ave. 24/7 in the red container. They are taking trees until 1/31.

Randall’s parking lot January 6 & 7 from 9 AM til Noon.

Y’all have a safe and Happy New Year celebration. And no, you’re not really that good. Get a designated driver.

You only have to wait 29 more days to get to stand in line for my world famous, award winning chili. I know its hard but it’s worth the wait.

Calvin: People think it must be fun to be a super genius, but they don't realize how hard it is to put up with all the idiots in the world. Hobbes: Isn't your pants' zipper supposed to be in the front?

Thursday, December 29, 2011


Put it on your calendar, Next Tuesday is the first City Council Meeting of 2012. Lets’ show up and see what’s on their minds. On the upside they only meet 8 more times before the elections in May!

I heard former Mayor McIntyre was campaigning at sunset the other night. Kathy is that true? You going to pitch your hat in the ring for one of the three city council seats coming up in May? How incredibly interesting.


From the GDN...
LEAGUE CITY — Christmas tree recycling is available for League City residents 24 hours a day, 7 days a week at the recycling center, 1535 Dickinson Ave.
If you’re not quite ready yet or are looking for a closer location, services will be available from 9 a.m. to noon Jan. 6-7 in the Randall’s parking lot on Marina Bay Drive and in Countryside Park.

And see yesterday’s blog about other sites…..

See y’all at sunset!

Sometimes I lie awake at night, and I ask, "Where have I gone wrong?" Then a voice says to me, "This is going to take more than one night." -- Charlie Brown, _Peanuts_ [Charles Schulz]



The original search engine for the

Whole Wide World

Tuesday, December 27, 2011

It's a beautiful Tuesday!

I hope everyone had as Merry a Christmas as I did. As a matter of fact I’m still having a Merry Christmas. Don’t know if I can milk it for 9 more days but I’ll let you know. Next up New Years! Can you believe it’s almost 2012? Ready for the next apocalypse? I think the Mayan dude that was carving the calendar just got tired. Probably went something like “ so what I’ll be dead in 2,000 years anyway and my right hand in numb, I’m done with the chisel, you want to go past 2012 knock your lights out” or two official calendar makers talking “ hey lets stop on this date, that’ll scare the crap out of ‘em..”

Don’t pitch that tree! If your yuletide centerpiece is starting to drop needles all over the house it’s could be time to pass it along. Don’t just kick it to the curb, here are a few options for your natural Christmas tree.

a) Rent a mulcher from United Rentals on Main Street in L.C.

b) Ellington recycle drop off site at Brantley Road and Hwy 3.

c) League City's recycling center, 1535 Dickinson Ave., is accepting live evergreens 24/7 in a designated large red container. The center will take Christmas trees until Jan. 31.

Randall’s at South Shore took them last year but I just got off the phone with them and they haven’t gotten the “official” word yet. I said I’d call back in a day or two so check back. I’ll post more options as I get them.

Then there’s this,

A public hearing re: Hwy 146 reconstruction “design alternative” was posted in today’s Chronicle.

Hearing is set for January 26th.

Bayside Intermediate School

4430 Village Way

League City, TX

Open House format: 5:30-6:30PM

Formal Public Hearing 6:30-7:30PM

Went for my routine checkup today
and everything seemed to be going
fine until he stuck his index fi nger
up my butt!
Do you think I should change dentists?

Sunday, December 25, 2011


Accept the rain as a sort of Christmas present. It kinda makes it not so cold. Merry Christmas y'all

Saturday, December 24, 2011

Happy Christmas Eve!

Did I mention my favorite part of our little vacation? We pulled in to the driveway too close to midnight after a very long day. Everyone was glad to be home and looking forward to our own beds. One last hike up the stairs and we're in. We have a key-less entry system on the door. Which is a good thing since we collectively suck at keeping up with keys. Wyatt was first up so he enters the code and Please dear GOD don't let it be a dead battery. MJ is next and as Wyatt is quickly reaching critical mass she intervenes and re-enters the code. I am halfway up the stairs when I hear the deadbolt slide back. A sigh of relief. Mel grabs the knob and turns to open. While I am not opposed to obscenities in print I will not type the parade of sounds that next crossed my ears. All I could manage was a half sincere "calm down". The door knob was locked. Remember that bit about keys? No clue where the key for the knob is so we never lock it. Perfect. Knowing the outcome we had to check the front door just because. I am now praying for an unlocked window. Thanks to the little cold front last week we found one close to the door so all it cost me to get in was a screen. Welcome home. I think I'm glad our neighbors are sound sleepers.

Here's two of your friends and neighbors representing

Thursday, December 22, 2011


I can’t tell you how glad I am to be back on our island. We went to a ski resort. Snow ski’s. Copper Mountain Co. to be more precise. If you’ve known me for more than a week or two you’ve heard me say “if it’s below 32 degrees it belongs in a cocktail glass swimming in Scotch” To say I am not a cold weather fan is a bit of an understatement. Anything less than 50 degrees and I start getting twitchy. I understand that if your goal is to have gravity drag your ass down a mountain on sticks dodging rocks, trees and other humans you want it to be cold so as to provide snow. I get it. I even tried it once on a huge pile of dirt in southern France. That’s why there is no doubt in my mind it does not fall under my definition of fun. I also know how to dress for the cold. I might look like the Michelin Man in blue but frankly, I don’t care. My biggest problem was the lack of oxygen. I guess I could breathe just fine if only there was something to breathe because when we got down to Denver I was downright peachy. Not my cup of tea. MJ and Wyatt had fun so it was worth it. This is more my style..

Time to get caught up on a few things. First up, I am sorry I missed the Caroling Carters. It is most definitely one of the finest events in Galveston County. Thanks to the Caldwell’s for providing us with such a great time all these years. How many years you ask? Not a clue. Bev? Walter? Anybody? I’d love to have a picture or two for the blog.

And thanks to the KVFD for giving Santa a lift Tuesday. Sorry I missed him too!

I could be wrong but there seems to be some clean up action going on over on Aspen. About time. I understand enough people got fed up enough with the trash pile and demanded action and are seeing some action. I think that’s how a government is supposed to work isn’t it? I also learned that you cannot have a boat in the water that does not have current and proper state registration. So no floating derelicts’. I like that idea. Not sure where the residents are getting their information but my son asked me last week why I didn’t like his pals’ dad. He asked why I was making John’s dad get rid of all his stuff. I asked him where he got his information and he said from his schoolmate John. Still unable to make the leap I sat my son down and told him the truth. I really hope it trickles back to the source. I honestly don’t give a shit what some people think about me but I don’t want John to think I’m a meanie because some asshat is filling an eleven year olds head with bullshit.

Here’s a HEADS UP to all you Cruzan fans. This is from neighbor Pamela the Z.
“Here is the reply I got from Jim Detmore, liquor buyer for Spec’s. You might want to post it on the blog. Also, DeeDee Thomas has a St. Croix Island Senator looking into it, too. Hopefully, we can get Beam to reconsider.
Hi Pamela,
We are NOT discontinuing Cruzan Rum Cream. Beam is the national importer and
they are not bringing it into US anymore. We bought all they had and we are
running out in all of our stores. If you would like to call our local Beam
Rep. to voice your displeasure, his phone number is 281-415-7570. Trust me,
I already have.
We still have some stores showing inventory. If you would tell me which side
of town you live on, chances are good we will have a store close by that has
some left.
Thanks for being our customer,

This from City Administrator Shelley just in time for Christmas,
“I will be hosting a class to obtain your Texas Concealed Handgun License this Saturday, December 17th 2011 from 800am to about 630pm at The Arms Room in League City Texas.
All you need is your UNLOADED handgun, drivers license and ammunition (we have gun rentals and ammo for sale).
The cost of the class is 100 dollars per person and includes, classroom instruction, photos, targets and range fees.
Sign up today and start the journey toward your self defense system. My contact info and directions are below and please feel free to forward this email to your friends and family.”
Thank you,
Brian Mobley
Cell 281-924-6105
Director of Firearms Training
The Arms Room
1941 Gulf Freeway South
League City Texas 77573 (next door to Petsmart)
Texas CHL Instructor 09079038

The next BIG thing is coming up at the end of January. No they didn't move New Years Eve Rob, I'm talking about The 30th Annual Chili Cook off at Craig & Raynels! Get ready for the Chili smack. And watch this space for more info.

“The wife has been missing a week now.
Police said to prepare for the worst.
So, I have been to the thrift shop
to get all of her clothes back.”

Wednesday, December 21, 2011

Miss me?

Sorry, been off island. I promise there's lot's of stuff coming up later today.

Wednesday, December 14, 2011

This is why you don't want to try Space Center. They are powering down the Space Center.

Monday, December 12, 2011


Guess what I found out at sunset on Friday? Our fair city is turning the big 50 next year! Now THAT’S a reason to celebrate! I’ll find out what the exact date is and post it here but for now we need to marshal our collective (yours anyhow) talents and start brainstorming. Lets’ get some of these ideas to the Mayor and Council and lets’ see what we can pull off. Maybe a series of events leading up to the big day? Everyone on the band wagon. Police department, City Staff, Parks, Pool, Hey all you folks at Watergate, Legend Point and Port-o-Fino y’all don’t want to miss this. Let’s hear from our Lazy Bend neighbors too! Who is our POC at Stewart these days? Talk to Mrs. Moses and see if Stewart wants to join in. All you artistic and creative types (MJ) what about a 50th Logo? T-Shirts? Anyone out there want to talk about corporate sponsorships? There is already one time capsule planted in the city, Do we want to plant another? Is this the time to go for the largest golf cart parade in Texas? We can use this blog to form a steering committee and let it roll from here. Ready, Set, Let your creative juices flow!
That’s right, it wasn’t a typo. There is a time capsule buried near the Club House. It was moved a few years back and I’m not sure who knows exactly where it is but that will be half the fun in another 40 years. The Civic Club planted it about 6 or 7 years ago on its 40th anniversary. Remember that.
I had a brain fart coming over the bridge the other day. Before I forget kudos to Diana Chronister and the parks committee for making the ride in look special. Once you get past the mud lots it looks great! Back to the brain fart. It would require 12 volunteers. It would start on Christmas day and the first volunteer has to have a pear tree. You can use a paper partridge if you want. Since we don’t have Turtle doves on this continent we’ll have to get creative and either use mourning doves (like anyone is gonna know) or something. The second volunteer would place a couple of birds somewhere on their property. Three French hens could get tricky but we have plenty of neighbors who have hens so we’re nearly there. I had to look up Colly birds. Just ordinary blackbirds could work. What’s up with all the birds? Anyway you see where I’m going with this. Or we could parody the whole thing? Just a thought. I got a million of ‘em.

See the Space Station Monday
Monday, Dec. 12, 7:07 p.m. (Duration: two minutes)
Path: 11 degrees above SSW to 29 degrees above SSW
Maximum elevation: 29 degrees
I pointed to two old drunks sitting across the bar from us and told my friend
"That's us in 10 years".
He said "That's a mirror, dip-shit!

Friday, December 9, 2011


The Charlie Brown Christmas Special made it's television debut. Now do you feel old?
Happy Friday everybody. It looks like it will be a tad warmer for tomorrows Boat Lane Parade. Always a good thing. Over the past 27 years that I've been watching It's been everything from blowing sleet at 33 degrees to tank tops and flip flops swatting mosquitoes. I guess it's just a crap shoot. You know what they say about Texas weather. I must admit I'm a little excited about this one just to see what they do for the 50th. I guess we'll find out in about 30 hours. Me and the Baconator aka Jimbob just put our latest batch in the fridge to cure. We went a little heavier on the course ground black pepper trying to mimic what we lovingly refer to as Chron bacon. I'll let you know in a couple of weeks how close we came. If this works as well as we hope it will I'll see if I can talk The Baconator into supervising the next round and maybe expand it by a few more bellies.

Before I run off to do errands and look for Apple wood for smoking said bellies I though I'd run this final recap of our ill sought claim to fame via the local press. I'm not getting my hopes up but we may be nearing the end since McIntyres favorite go to source, T.J. Aulds of the GDN, told her to go away. She presented her latest red herring and was politley told there is no story here. That's one. Since I never heard from the female from the Chronicle and never got wind of a published piece I'll assume that whole "wait for the bomb" ended up on the editors floor also. That's two. As yet Mr. Dean from Channel 2 is a no show and given TV's short attention span for news you have to think it also died on the vine. Three. There was that fun piece in the Houston Press by Steve Jansen. I hope he does a follow up. I'd guess someone else will need to call him though since the Jean and Larry show was pretty much a washout.Four. I hope you got a chance to check out his Youtube moment. That was fun. Let's not forget our latest visitors, Channels 13 and 39, looking in to "obscene" yard art and what not. Five and six. Which brings us to our more local news source Florian Martin with the Bay Area News who wrote about the exoneration of Paul Shelley and what little our expensive investigation actually revealed. Lucky number 7. Now in no way do I mean to short TJ or the GCDN by only counting them once. God knows our little soap opera has used up enough of their ink and space with countless drivel. That's why I put them first. Compensation? Maybe. What did you think about the Mayors statement? Did it seem a little like a CYA piece as a prelude to a lawsuit? Maybe it's just me. Remember this, If you've been paying attention you will have realized the recurring theme in these blogs. This is not over. There is still 145 days left in which to screw even more stuff up.
See you around the Island!!

"Boudreaux and Trosclair were a couple of drinking buddies who worked as aircraft mechanics at de Bayou Teche, Louisiana, International Airport.
One day the airport was fogged in and they were stuck in the hangar with nuttin to do.
Boudreaux say, “Man, I wish we had somtin to drink!
... Trosclair say, “Me, too. Y’know, I’ve heard you can drink dat jet fuel and get a buzz.”
So dey pour demselves a couple of glasses of high octane gas and get completely smashed.
De next morning, Boudreaux wake himsef up and is surprise at how good he feel. In fact, he feel Great! No hangover, no bad side effects. Nutting!
Then de phone ring. It’s Trosclair.
Trosclair say, “Hey, how you are dis morning?”
Boudreaux say, “Man, I feel great. How bout you?”
Trosclair say, “I feel great, too. You don’t have a hangover?”
Boudreaux say, “No, dat jet fuel is great stuff – no hangover, nuttin. We ought to do dis more often.”
Trosclair say, “Yeah, well dey’s just one thing.
Boudreaux say, “What’s that?”
Trosclair say, “Have you farted yet?”
Boudreaux say, No.”
Trosclair say, “Well, don’t – cause I’m in Shreveport!”

Wednesday, December 7, 2011

Pearl Harbor Day

Never Forget
This is a heads up from our Lazy Bend neighbors. Hello Friends and Neighbors,
I am reaching out to you today to ask if any of you witnessed anyone taking the Nautical Anchors and posts that are adjacent to Birch Road where the County is working on the bridge construction. The construction crew said several people stopped to inquire about them. If you have any information about there where abouts, please contact me. Thank you,
Priscilla Duffy
Well if you missed the meeting last night shame on you. Maybe it’s just me but there was entirely waaaaay too much time spent on which word to use. The Mayor wanted to use “must” and Councilman Perkins insisted on “should”. This was all in context of enforcing the process of contacting the city attorney. What some folks couldn’t, methinks wouldn’t, wrap their questionable gray matter around was the wording DOES NOT STOP A COUNCILMAN FROM CONTACTING THE ATTORNEY AT $200.00 an hour. Sorry, I didn’t mean to yell but some people are just thick. Enclosed is a copy of the statement read by the Mayor.
Proper operation of democratic government requires that public officials and employees be independent, impartial and responsible to the people of the city they serve. Governmental decisions and policies should be made in the proper channels of the governmental structure and NO public officer, member of council, committees or employee should engage, directly or indirectly, indulge in personalities, use language personally offensive, arraign motives of members, charge deliberate misrepresentation, or use any language tending to hold a member of the City Council or staff up to contempt; or the insinuation of wrongdoing. Anyone who violates this tenet should be subject to admonishment or censure.
As Mayor for five and a half years and a resident for almost 40 years, I have never witnessed our great city, residents and staff alike, embroiled in such controversy. With that, I would like the minutes to reflect my statement.
It is my belief that certain members of council pursued, mediated and conducted an unauthorized investigation regarding perceived personnel matters with individuals with whom they had a personal and/or political relationship. These members have misled their fellow council members and residents with the allusion of criminal activity and severe wrongdoing. This unauthorized investigation in no way reflects the beliefs or desires of the City Council as a whole and the City assumes NO liability for the actions of those individual council members.
As a result, the council engaged a professional investigator that conducted a full investigation that only resulted in minor policy/procedure infractions made by all management personnel of the police department. Although the professional investigation is over, apparently the investigation by these council members is not. The professional investigator specifically instructed Council to stop all investigation activity on multiple occasions. This investigation, so far, has cost the city $66,780.87. These costs do not include the costs of a stagnant and clearly combative council, the defaming of city officers, the countless hours of time and energy dedicated to the harassment by way of open records requests and so on.
Let me remind you that the City has a professional audit each year, to which at last year’s meeting, the auditor informed Council the city greatly improves each year. The City also has been awarded with the Gold Circle from the State Comptroller’s Office for transparency. It would be my assumption that if a group of professional auditors and the State Comptroller’s Office deems us to be in such high financial regard, then anything that these council members and residents are investigating seems like an oppressive attempt to intimidate.
These actions are a poor reflection on our City, our Council and our residents. Although this censure carries no legal punishment, it is my request to any other council member to make a motion to accept my statement and publically vote that they did not authorize any investigation, prior to engagement with the firm of Davidson and Trolio, to release said members and the City’s liability for the actions of the above stated members.
Remember--a motion and a second does not bind a member to vote in favor. It is imperative that the City begin to repair and move forward. “
I am not alone when I say Thank you Mayor Johnson! From a lot of us, to you, Well done. Please merciful God let our city Council hear these words. I’ll make it as easy as I can …

Open Mtgs made Easy Handbook -
realize it's not flash cards for some of us to understand, but it clearly states what the law allows to enter into Executive Session. "I don't want to talk in front of the meanies" isn't one of them...
Section 551.101 states the requirements for holding a closed session. It
If a closed meeting is allowed under this chapter, a governmental body may not conduct the closed meeting unless a quorum of the governmental body first convenes in an open meeting for which notice has been given as provided by this chapter and during which the presiding officer publicly:
(1) announces that a closed meeting will be held; and
(2) identifies the section or sections of this chapter under which the closed meeting is held.
These are the ones that apply to cities:
Govt Code 551.071 Consultation with Attorney
551.072 Deliberation regarding Real Property
551.073 Deliberation regarding Prospective Gift
551.074 Personnel Matters
551.075 Deliberation regarding Security Devices
551.077 Agency financed by Federal Govt
551.084 Exclusion of witness from Hearing
551.086 Mtg concerning Municipally owned utility
551.087 Deliberation regarding Economic Development Negotiation
551.088 Deliberation regarding test item
And from Occupy Tindel:
December 6,2011
Jack Fryday, Building InsPector
City of Clear Lake Shores
1016 South Shore Dr.
Clear Lake Shores, Texas 77565
Dear Inspector Fryday:
As property owners in Clear Lake Shores, we are concerned about the rubbish
and objectionable, unsightly and unsanitary nature that
exists on the land and in the canal adjacent to Aspen and Tindel Roads.
We are attaching our City Ordinance 42 Article III regarding rubbish
We are attaching our City Ordinance 78 Article VI regarding junk vehicles.
We are attaching the regulation from Parks and Wildlife stating that all boats
have to be registered with them. Since there are seven or so boats in the canal
that appear to be inoperable, we would appreciate you verifying in your
official capacity if all these boats are registered and in compliance.
We understand from Government Land Office (GLO) that property owners do
own the land from their waters edge out half way into the canal but that the
water is owned by the public and anyone has access to that water. Therefore,
we feel the city can enforce issues regarding derelict boats in the waterway.
This situation does not represent our area being called the yachting Capital
of Texas and we would appreciate your attention to this matter.
Our city and EDC have put in tremendous work the past few years since Hurricane Ike applying for grant money to improve the entrance to the island
and we would appreciate the city enforcing its ordinances to make property owners along Aspen and Tindel clean up their properties. Junk cars
and junk boats, We feel this is an eyesore and is a hindrance to the beautification project underway in that area.

(42 Concemed Citizens Signatures Attached)
CC:Mayor Vern Johnson
City Administrator paul Shelley
Acting Police Chief Kenneth Cook
Council members Burns, Sowrey, Fuller, perkins,Laughter
If anyone else would like to sign this let me know and I’ll get you pointed in the right direction.
My girlfriend thinks that I'm a stalker.
Well, she's not exactly mygirlfriend yet.